Gratitue and Mutant Bugs

So it's been nearly a decade since my last post.

I know, I know. I'm a slacker.

Life has just been to crazy for me to even sit still for 5 minutes, let alone post on my blog. Yeah, the one that, like, 2 people read (myself included). :) But hopefully I'll have a little bit more time to fill you all in on the happenings on my little life.

First item of business, we get our puppy tomorrow! We're going to name her Zoe. She's a purebred Lab and the direct descendant of the best Lab known to mankind (Duke --the dog that's pictured with my husband in my header). But if, in the near future, you see something like "I wish I could sleep a whole night through without Zoe whimpering to be held" or "Zoe just knocked over the bed stand and gnawed on everything that fell on the floor" or "Anybody want a puppy?".... you'll know why =o)

Secondly, I really love my husband. He has already showed me so much patience, kindness, and understanding in our marriage that I'll never be able to repay him. But I'll have fun trying!

Thirdly, our house is a haven for mutant bugs. And it somehow likes to attract anything that would like to curl up and die. Let me illustrate.

Yesterday, I came home from running errands and I had about 4 bags in each hand. I got to the bottom of our stairs and started to unlock the door when out of the corner of my eye, I saw a gray blob. Pretty sure it was a pigeon. Just chillin' about 1 foot away from me. I nearly peed my pants. I had an image flash before my eyes of it getting scared and flapping all over the place and me dropping all the bags of groceries and running around screaming.

Luckily, it must have been soothed by my mindless chatter about how it should stay put until I was in the house. I was able to slowly inch my way into the apartment and drop off the first load of groceries. Back out I went for round 2. By then, the pigeon had decided I was crazy and it had better get out of the way. The poor little thing practically just rolled over and over until it was able to get underneath the planter box I have suspended in the corner of the entryway. It wasn't lookin' so hot. Poor little thing!

As soon as Chuck woke up, I told him about the bird and he looked outside. "Yup. It's dead." he said. Pretty sure I started freaking out. I told him he would have to take care of it before I stepped foot outside again. He did, of course, but I still felt really bad for my little pigeon friend. He's in good company, though, I'm fairly sure. There's probably a section of Heaven designated for things that have died in our entryway. There are spiders, grasshoppers, praying mantis', beetles, crickets... you name it, it's probably come to our stairwell to die.

Today I was stalking a mutant-sized fly around our apartment so I could get a chance to kill it. This thing must have eaten its Wheaties growing up, because it was HUGE. Three hits with flyswatter later, I finally got it. It fell limp to the floor and I watched for a few seconds to make sure he was really dead. I got a paper towel and strategically picked it up so I wouldn't have to feel him squished in between my fingers. I HATE that feeling. I tossed it in the trash and went along my merry way.

A few minutes later, I walked back into the kitchen to grab something. I glanced at the trashcan and saw a sickly looking fly perched on the side of the bag. I thought to myself "Pretty sure that when I threw the paper towel in the trash can, the dead fly wasn't left resting on the corner of the garbage can. Something's not quite right here..." I watched it out of the corner of my eye, and suffice it to say that though this fly might have hit the gym a couple million times in its youth, it obviously flunked 'How To Escape From the Trash Can After Playing Dead 101".

The little punk was trying to escape! I gave him a good smack with the flyswatter and watched him fall lifeless to the bottom of the trashcan. I don't think he could fake TWO deaths, so I continued on my way. So far, he hasn't tried rising from the dead again. Let's hope the spider I had to squish 4 times shortly thereafter is of the same mind.

I left a shirt laying on a towel in my room (of the "lay flat to dry" breed) and I went to check on its status after killing the fly. I flipped up one end to help air it out and a spider made its bid for freedom. After peeling myself off of the ceiling, I grabbed a shoe and squished it. But it wouldn't squish. Every time I lifted up the shoe to see if it was dead, it would try running. I finally resorted to grinding the shoe into the ground... and it still tried running away. Maybe I'm just a woosie and I can't kill bugs. I don't know. But I finally got the dang spider to give up the ghost. Of course, I did a little dance for 30 seconds after throwing him in the trashcan because I felt it's carcass between my fingers through the Kleenex before I could throw him away. And as you probably remember, I HATE that feeling. It's just like hearing/feeling them squish underneath your shoe. But worse.

Whew. Okay. I'm done ranting about mutant bugs and my inability to kill them.

Time to move along to the next wild adventure waiting in the shadows! =o)

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